Conquering Mt. Never Rest
Some days at home just don’t turn out well, no matter what you do! Your six-year-old has an ear infection for the third time in as many months. The toddler flushes a toy down the toilet when your back is turned. While preparing a casserole for the church supper tonight, you frantically search for an ingredient you thought was in the pantry, but now you can’t find it. You notice a small stream of water originating under the washing machine and making its way slowly along the baseboard and into the floor. Oh, dear! Your faithful fifteen-year-old washer is about to breathe its last while you are staring at a mountain of laundry—Mt. Never Rest, as I’ve heard it affectionately called. Come to think of it, why do so many calamities at home seem to involve volumes of water?
Get organized? You would just like some sleep! After a day like this, you are grateful for a new beginning of a new day. In Psalm 48, God reminds us that, even on our difficult days, He is in control. We are to remember His lovingkindness, and we are to praise the Lord of hosts. He can certainly handle our concerns if He can handle the entire universe and more.
I am sure you have had days like this. How do you get back on track when you do? How do you stay on the mountain more often than you live in the valley of chaos?
First, remember.
Remember
Remember that the Lord gave you the family you have. He doesn’t make mistakes. Taking care of your home, loving your husband, and training your children is a challenging job, but it is one to which the Lord has called you and equipped you.
Remember there are some things you cannot control. A washing machine breaking at an inopportune time is out of your hands. Ask the Lord to help you accept those things from His hand and, in the process, teach you about His plans. When you align your heart with God’s heart, you are able to trust Him in all circumstances. He is your refuge and strength.
Despite your feelings, you probably are doing some things well. Recall those things and see how you can carry that creative spirit to other areas of your home. Acknowledge the out-of-control things that you have the ability to change, and ask the Lord to guide you in managing your home to bring Him glory.
Remember that you would still have laundry, meals, shopping, and household management to accomplish even if you sent the children to school. You would still have to train your children, and you would have less time in which to accomplish that training. If they attended an institutional school, you would wish they were at home.
Remember that knowing God and teaching your children to know Him is your primary purpose. Your homeschooling happens through the context of your life as you live in dependence on the Lord (Psalm 48:12-14).
Take Action
Reminding yourself of these things is the first step. It restores your perspective. But, there are also things you can do to move you back to the mountain from the valley of despair.
• Examine your priorities. Have you overextended yourself with too many outside activities? Have you overplanned? Are you expecting to keep a “perfect” home, thus failing to live up to your own expectations? Look for changes you need make in your priorities.
• Look for time-wasters in your day. Too much computer time? Phone time? Too much time spent just deciding what to do next? Oh, and changing your school schedule on a beautiful day to go to the park or reading to your children for thirty minutes longer than you had planned are not time-wasters, unless you frequently do that just to leave the house or to avoid your responsibilities.
• Accept the fact that you can do some tasks better than others. Look for ways to improve in your areas of weakness.
• Seek an older woman or veteran homeschooler as a mentor. We have much to share with each other. Read and glean what you can from others in books, support groups, and at conferences, but recognize that your family is unique. What works for someone else may not work for you.
• Train your family to help. Your parents may not have taught you well how to manage a home, but you can train your children as you learn. Your children need to learn the many lessons that working at home can teach them: working as a team, stewardship of possessions, developing a strong work ethic, serving others, and much more. Teach them so they will be well-equipped to handle everyday tasks in their adult lives. Habits are powerful, but you must teach them.
• Experiment by doing a household task in a new way. You may discover a better way to accomplish a job quicker and easier than how you have been doing it. Don’t do things the way you are doing them just because your mother did them that way!
• Build a basic routine in your week. A weekly routine based on a predictable sequence of happenings keeps you on track. Not a minute-by-minute schedule which is impossible to keep, but a skeleton routine that allows for housework, play time, school time, and Bible or worship time in your day.
• Go back to your basic routine as quickly as possible after an emergency shifts your priorities. Real life is rather messy, isn’t it? It’s a remarkable mixture of the mundane and unsuspected. You must continually change and adjust, but having a basic routine in place allows you to keep the necessities under control. It allows you to go back to those necessities quickly when you have to deviate from the routine.
• Look for ways to simplify in every area you can: your school schedule, your housework, your meals, your activities. Don’t make things complicated by trying to duplicate some “perfect” system or schedule that you read about. Develop your own pattern that fits your family.
• Be willing to change wherever you battle with disorganization, and persevere to bring order and peace to your home. It is worth the effort! Take baby-steps and don’t be overwhelmed with everything you see at once.
I am very grateful for new beginnings the Lord gives when He lifts us from our valley to His mountaintop. It is a freeing place to be. When you have failed in some aspect of your home management or homeschooling, remember that learning is a continual process. As Psalm 48 reminds us, the Lord will be your guide.